After watching this pathetic attempt at pushing the series smack into the mainstream, I actually feel bad about my somewhat negative review of “Hellbound”. Even though the second sequel made no sense whatsoever, it at least carried on the feel and look of the original. In a sense, both were cult films that received major theatrical play. “Hell On Earth” makes the big mistake of pushing the Pinhead character right out into the front of things instead of the supporting role of the first two where he was way more effective. You can tell that the studio wanted another “Freddy Krueger cash cow”, and boy did they fuck things up with this one.

Pinhead is now split in two, with his good side (Elliot) wandering a World War One limbo, and the evil side (Pinhead) stuck in one of those weird pillars we saw in the first two flicks. A young yuppie buys the pillar from an art gallery and places it in his bar and is soon tricked by Pinhead to feed him fresh bodies. Pinhead then proceeds to break free of his prison and attempts to create “hell on earth” or something like that. Meanwhile, Elliot uses his ghostly powers to contact a female reporter named Joey (the actress could not act worth crap, but man what legs!) to help him put a stop to Pinhead once and for all. I remember reading my old Fango articles about this one, in which the filmmakers insisted this film was going to be dark, scary, and serious. Not even close. The whole thing, even the gore, has a cartoony vibe to it…I think director Anthony Hickox thought he was working on another “Waxwork” film or something. Pinhead as I mentioned is pushed to the front and gets way to much screen time and definitely too many lines. Every time he talks its “pleasures of flesh this, suffering that”, blah, blah, and blah. Enough already. While the previous entries had that cold “British” feel to them, this one, shot in the states, feels like a slasher film with Pinhead getting that Freddy Krueger vibe going. Even the attempts at some new Cenobites are lame. I mean c’mon, would you believe a “CD” Cenobite who throws compact discs at you, or how about a “Camerahead” Cenobite that mutters Krueger like one-liners of “that’s a wrap”. Somebody shoot me...now.

Scenes I did enjoy, few as they were, was the “bar massacre” scene and Pinhead’s attempt at Holy Communion. The f/x was pretty good in the “bar massacre” scene, with Pinhead locking everyone in while commencing to hook everyone with his trusty chains and stuff. Pretty cool. The scene where Pinhead struts into a church was the best thing about this flick, even his dialogue was pretty good here what with the “happy are they who come to my supper” bit.

Overall though, the whole thing just felt off. The “Hellraiser” films are not slasher flicks and that is what this one felt like. Gone is the dark and weird S+M type vibe of the first two films, replaced with a much more mainstream flavor. Overall, “Hell On Earth’ is a big disappointment for fans of the series.