The Hills Have Eyes (2006)

Well, I’m just going to come right out and say it. I liked this film. Out of all the crappy remakes of Grade-A, primo horror films in the wake of the last several years, someone finally, finally got it right. French director Alexandre Aja, who brought us the equally excellent film High Tension back in 2004, updates and slightly alters Craven’s classic film in all the right ways. Thank god, because if Zombo and myself had to sit through one more piss awful remake, well, it just wouldn’t be good. Trust me.

I’ll spare the plot details here because chances are you already know the basics, but I guess I can sum it up in the next line. All American family on a cross-country trip takes a wrong turn in the dessert, running afoul of inbred mutant types with a taste for human flesh. That you know. However, what I liked that director Aja does with his version, as opposed to Craven’s, is that he gives a little more back story as to the tale of the cannibal clan. Some times less is more, as was with Craven’s film. In the old version things are just sorta implied as to why these crazy fuckers are all deformed and eating human value meals as they happen by, and it worked. The same thing applied to another cannibal flick, Tobe Hooper’s TCM. You don’t really know how or why these crazy fucks are out doing what they’re doing, they just are. And, somehow, that made the events even more frightening. However, it was cool to get a little bit of a back story, an it gave this version of Hills a little more substance. There are also various little tweaks here and there, in both characters and overall story. For instance, in going along with the whole back story angle, Aja gives us an entire abandoned mining community, complete with TCM set design and some truly creepy ass mannequins littering the landscape. I’m a sucker for mannequins in horror films, blame 1979’s Tourist Trap for that. Again though, it’s cool to see a director do a remake yet add his own twists, ala Carpenter’s The Thing or Cronenberg’s The Fly.

The main attraction of Hills and other like minded seventies drive-in fare was the overall grittiness and intensity they oozed. I’m happy to report that this new version retains all that intensity (go with the UNRATED version) and then some. The hillbilly mutants in this one are maybe even more fucked up both in looks and actions than were in Craven’s film, and I never thought I’d find myself saying that. These be some sick motherfuckers, and even though the cast is not the most likeable (bad mistake) you’ll be cheering em’ on (you go Beast!) to get the bad guys. The gore and violence in the UNRATED version easily surpasses most recent genre fare I have seen, and it’s truly some gruesome stuff. Beheadings, stabbings, gun shots to the noggin, it’ s all here in NC-17 level glory. As stated above, the set design is also truly top-notch with the obvious TCM inspired scenery readily apparent.

The Hills remake does stumble during the opening 45 minutes, as I was pretty much rooting for the cannibal clan at first. Many of the family members came across as whiny babies, and it wasn’t until the mutants started doing some truly evil shit did I start rooting for the “good guys”. Aja also employs some rather herky jerky 28 Days Later styled editing that sorta grained on my nerves, but that’s to be found in almost any new film. These complaints are few, and even with the occasional lack of logic here and there, it’s all easily overlooked thanks to the films overall badass vibe. Good stuff, and you can throw this baby in the “remakes that don’t suck” department. Who would have thought?